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Over the past 15 months I have been encouraging (or making) myself stay on a fitness journey. It has had many challenges for sure, but I have been fortunate enough to “tap into” a great support system through a FB group and with an online trainer and app system.

When I first started out, I tried to go it alone, and was doing surprisingly well! I started off the New Year in 2016 skating on our pond in our community, then “Google trained” myself to learn about HIIT classes, Tabata, weights, and even dabbled in some yoga and body strength exercises. Shortly after I started immersing myself in workouts, a friend of mine committed to coming to my house and working out with me at 5 am, 3–4 mornings per week. It was a great way to get onto this path, and it kept me accountable and on track.

Then she quit. No telling me that that she was done, or any type of notice. She just quit. When I invited her to come, she would say she would be here, I would get my ass out of bed, and she would no-show me. So, I kept on track, alone.

After the first month, I was expecting to notice a dramatic change; maybe some weight loss, maybe a change in my “old lady” body. Nope. Only managed to lose about 2 lbs and the measurements of my limbs, butt and midsection had barely changed. WTF!! So, I added water , LOTS OF WATER, every day to try and keep my calories down. I was watching what I was eating and had a rule about no junk, no sugar and only good fats. I stayed on track with this plan for another month, and guess what?!?!? I lost a pound! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!!?!??! ONE LOUSY POUND!!???

Everyone had advice. Take this pill, drink hot water and lemon, eat hot peppers, drink green tea, drink apple cider vinegar (GAG!), stop eating after 6 pm, cut out all carbs, eat nothing BUT carbs, drink this shake, eat this bar……it went on and on. I spent more time on Google looking for weight loss solutions than I did working at my job in a week! I tried the majority of these too!! I also spent a small fortune on protein shakes, supplements and weight loss “pills’.

After i did this for another 2 months, I stepped on the scale, and now, I GAINED TWO POUNDS!! What is wrong with me!??! Why was nothing working?

This is when I did a self examination of what a “day in the life of me” looks like. I wake up, have coffee, drink water and workout. Then I get showered, usually choke down a protein shake and some more coffee, then head to work, For lunch I typically have salad and a protein (chicken, tuna or eggs), then I come home, have another coffee, try and drink lots of water, and make supper. Typically supper is meat, vegetables and sometimes a starch (brown rice/potatoes etc). Then I enjoy some time either writing or watching TV with my guy, then go to bed. The next day is very similar, as is the day after that.

One thing I forgot to mention, is that I haven’t had a period in about 7 years. I have a blood condition that causes my monthly monster to last about 2 to 3 weeks, which makes me exhausted and sick for the other week of the month. My Gyno put me on a hormonal shot called Lupron to make my period stop, as well as what she refers to as, an “add back” of Estrace (Estrogen in a low dose). After the first year on this stuff, she deemed me her new “poster child” for Lupron. My body has responded very well to it, and I feel great! Also I have no more period to contend with, which makes me and my partner extremely happy. Overall I feel great, except I can get tired easily and pee often.

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The other day I was reading some information and forums online and I learned something very important about HRT (Hormone Replacement Therapy). IT IS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO LOSE WEIGHT! Well, there is a “face palm”, kick in the crotch kind of moment for you! I cannot tell you how many swear words came out of my mouth when I was reading the reviews, comments and forum based discussions on this topic.

On one hand, I am very fortunate that I feel good. On the other, it is extremely frustrating that I cannot shed weight. I will say, however, that my muscles are strong! I have actually developed much more strength in all my training, and am able to workout for almost 2 hours and feel great afterward! My arms are getting definition, and so is my back. My legs are solid but still quite big. I am, what I can only describe as “Strumpy”. I am strong and lumpy (and sometimes grumpy). Key word being Strong.

I also, as much as I don’t like to think about it, have my parent’s genes. My mother has a very German build, bigger boned, lots of thigh and lots of boob. I have her genetic bone and body structure, but my boobs have never been like hers. Genetics play a huge part in my overall health and inability to lose weight. However, even though I knew what I was getting into when starting HRT, I forgot over the years that Lupron plays a significant role on your body composition.

Dont get me wrong, I am not obese, nor am I what you would call “fat”. I hold my own in a bikini at 48 years old and don’t care who sees the minor cellulite patch on the backs of my legs. I would LOVE to be same size and weight I was 7 years ago which was a difference of about 15 lbs. However, I have been through eating disorders, unhealthy weight loss and poor eating/diet habits and know first hand the damage these can do. I will never go down that road again.

I know, that at this time on my life, Lupron and Estrace are what works for me and my general health. There are many opinions and other people out there who have not experienced the positive results I have had, however, in my case, having a period is almost life threatening and has definitely improved my QUALITY of life. That is all I can ask for.

I am okay with being somewhat “lumpy” with some meat on my bones. I will continue working out and hope that at some point, it will make me feel like it is all worth it. I enjoy the seclusion of my home gym in my basement and with the help of my trainer and app, have the ability to push myself to become strong and fit.

And learn to embrace my “STRUMPY” new self

*DISCLAIMER- I am not an expert or any type of medical professional. I only write this based on the results of my 7 years on this medication, and information read/provided from others who have experienced the same.

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