“You need to argue with your spouse, or you are not being your authentic self”
This is a quote from a close friend of mine, who shall remain anonymous.
I was telling my friend, during a wine chat, how refreshing it is to not be in a relationship full of arguing and drama, for a change. As we sat, sipping our glasses of red, I couldn’t help but notice the slight eye roll shadow her face. …
At the risk of writing, yet another, article about narcissism, I feel the need to share a few lies I have been told over the years, that can mess a person up.
If you have experiences with this type of human, you may not even know what lies they have told you, to keep you under their controlling programming. It has been a few years since my escape, and I am still learning what the lies were. I am sure there have been more, but these are the most significant.
The narcissist will play all types of mind games on…
Have you been surrounded by negativity from others, during these strange times? I understand that it has been beyond difficult to cope, after our world was hit by such a shit storm with the pandemic, as well as the economical fallout, the losses, and the fear of becoming sick.
Hopefully, on a global level, the Covid clouds have begun to part, and things are slowly starting to turn back, to what we typically would call “normal”. It is time to find our smiles again, and try to find reasons to stay positive.
Let’s face it, being around negative people and…
Disclaimer; I am not, nor would I, advise to NOT get a vaccine against COVID. I am simply sharing my experiences with all of you. I got my vaccine so I can work in my field, and feel secure that I am not a spreader of the sickness, and to protect myself. Your decision about vaccines are strictly up to you.
The Pfizer-BioNTech COVID 19 vaccine has been blowing up our world. There are other vaccines, such as Astra Zeneca and Moderna, of course, but in all of my reading and research for my OWN body, I opted to go…
I have no idea what brought this to the forefront of my thoughts, but today, I feel unhealed from past events.
Perhaps it is because of where I was a couple years ago. Maybe it is the sounds of the spring weather, or this time of year, but today seems like a flashback day. Something is triggering those familiar feelings of emotional manipulation.
Being with an emotionally abusive person is not easy to recover from. In fact, I have had my share of trauma from abusers before; physically, mentally, and sexually, and I healed from those damages much more easily…
“Why do you still have a relationship with that monster? He abused you!”
If I had a dime for every time I have been asked that question, I would be on a beach, living the dream as a retired writer.
A bit of history- My father abused me and my sister from the age of 5 until we were teens. He was a true monster who visited our bedrooms in the middle of the night, while my passed out mother slept through it all. We were unprotected by one parent and full on physically and sexually abused by the other…
If someone would have told me, years ago, that I was with a member of the narcissist club, I would have thought they were crazy.
He was a nice guy. He was the most caring person I had ever met. He came across as a listener, who genuinely heard me when I spoke, and who would offer me help, with literally everything. In fact, he would help me, even when I never asked for it…
That should have been my first warning.
You awake in the morning and smile at your partner, before offering him or her a cup of fresh coffee. You say, “Good morning, how did you sleep?” before you give each other a hug and kiss. You can’t help but smile.
This is the start to a good day of healthy relationship-ing.
How do we know that?
This past year has been full of reminders and painful memories of what I have overcome after years of abuse. I cannot explain this to you if you have never been emotionally, physically, sexually or physically abused, but I will try to help you comprehend what happens when you begin to heal.
The first thing all survivors of abuse need to realize is that your healing is never done. There is never a finish line or a light at the end of the tunnel. …
Have you ever noticed that when you are having a shit day, others take time to listen?
Often, people who are close to you, or even friends on social media will take the time out of their hectic lives to reach out and ask you “what’s going on?” if you dare to post something negative. People tend to gravitate toward misery, and I am not sure why.
On the other side of the fence, if you post something positive, about how happy you are, how successful you feel, or how much money you earn, you hear crickets.
Why, oh why…
Writer of relationships / early childhood and mental health . Poetry and fiction dabbler